Why does my mental dog come and whimper and do that weird whiny thing, and run back and forth and back and forth and go to the door like he wants to be let out and then as soon as I let him out the door, he stands there and barks at me? Seriously? You bark at the door to get out, and now, not even two seconds later, you bark to get in. You didn't even do anything. You didn't even leave the porch. Run, play, sniff stuff, pee on something, I don't know. When you are inside you run in circles around the house, but I let you out the door and you sit. Weird.
So he is sitting in the backyard and every few seconds I hear the bark, at least the neighbors all have super annoying barky dogs so I can let him deal for a bit and they can't say anything.
Sunday, August 22, 2010
Thursday, August 19, 2010
Well, at least it wasn't poop.
It was pee, and it was alot of it. My daughter, who has had maybe 1 accident all summer, has now had 3 within a week. Today, it was all over my bathroom floor, enough that I thought maybe the toilet actually overflowed. Into the tub we went. Soaked child, soaked floor. This house is getting a top to bottom scrub today. Of course, when it initially happened, I had laundry sorted all over the bathroom floor to wash, and in actuality had planned to clean the bathroom later. So do you know what I did? If you guessed that I grabbed my shark steam mop and cleaned it right up, well, bzzzzzzt, you're wrong. Know what I DID do? I grabbed a dirty towel and placed it on top of the pond puddle and decided to handle it in a bit. I cleaned up my kid (she bathed and I cleaned her bathroom, how is that right?) and there is still a wet towel on my bathroom floor. I should probably handle that before my husband gets home.Yeah, so maybe I should finish this up and get some coffee going to motivate my up before 5 sleepy ass.
I think swarming locusts will be next, who knows the night is still young.
I think swarming locusts will be next, who knows the night is still young.
And now...
the dog has puked all over. At least it was partially on the hardwood, and the other part on the rug. Already had the carpet cleaner out. I guess the rug is getting cleaned now too. What is next? I am guessing something to do with poop. I don't know why, but I just have a feeling. Stay tuned.
One of those days?
Have you ever had one of those days where you are woken up by your husband at 430 AM to help him clean up maggots that are coming out of the garbage can? Yeah, well as of today, I have had one of those days. Now, I am not a disgusting pig or a complete slob. I will admit, I have been lax the past couple of weeks because I was in a funk and I started on my anti- depressants again, so things are starting to look up. Taking baby steps. But maggots, seriously?!?!?!
First let me say, it is not like we have a giant garbage can that is full to the brim and rotten and stuff. It is a smallish one, actually two- one for recycle and one for trash. Both get taken out almost every day by my wonderful husband. So how we came to have MAGGOTS is beyond me! Yes, I have seen a fly or two, but with three kids and a dog constantly in and out and in and out and, well, you get the idea. Here is how this morning went. I was asleep, SOUND asleep, as I usually am at 430 AM. Then I hear, Mommas, I need your help down here. As I jump up I see my husband at the top of the stairs in his boxers and latex gloves. Initially I think, what the hell!!! What weird thing has he woken me up out of a peaceful slumber to do...with latex gloves on, no less. Yeah, my mind can go to weird places. That thought was brief though, because only a second later he informed me of the situation.
I shivered, my skin crawled, I started to itch and scratch and I think I vomited a little in my mouth. Oh, in case I didn't mention it, I hate bugs and creepy crawlies. Worms are among the least favorite, and maggots are at the top of the gross out list. I even tolerate slugs more, and that is because they don't move as quick and I can see where they went if they try to hide. Back to the main story here. So I run down and the scene in the kitchen is somewhat hilarious and somewhat disturbing. There is a smell that slightly burns my throat and eyes and there is a white substance all over my floor. Hmmmm.....what happened here?
Well, apparently my husband tried many things, but maggots are tolerant little buggers. He tried salt right off the bat, since we know this works for both ants and slugs. We had a big slug problem at our last town home. Lines of salt at all the door jams and window sills. We looked like we were trying to do some weird voodoo, or maybe attract deer. Well, it doesn't effect maggots. If anything, it enhanced the flovor of the crap they were eating. Way to go there top chef husband. So then he decided to find the bug spray we have. This stuff smells horrible, and that is probably why it is outdoor spray. But it was used there. Guess what, nothing. Now they are just annoyed that their meal is covered in bug spray, which for all I know is better than salt, who knows.
I must mention that the garbage can has already been removed from the house and sealed, but they were crawling out of it, yeah it was discovered initially because as my husband was making breakfast, he heard a rustling noise. Thank goodness he discovered it, because I would have FREAKED OUT!!!!
Back to getting rid of them. I ran back upstairs, and immediately looked up how to kill them Well, I can poor boiling water on them, sweep them up and freeze them, squish them, and some other things too. I can't really poor boiling water straight onto my carpet or hardwood, so we sweep everything up, seal the bag, and I begin to look for escapees. As I yell, my husband squishes them. Then he abandons me. Well, he has to go to work. I have been on maggot patrol now all morning. And I have been cleaning like a maniac. That kicked me out of the funk for sure. I said I needed motivation, well, there is was, wriggling around my kitchen.
Yeah, so that was the start of my day, so can it get better? Hopefully, my husband has already promised beer and pizza for dinner, so I will at least get a break after cleaning all day.
First let me say, it is not like we have a giant garbage can that is full to the brim and rotten and stuff. It is a smallish one, actually two- one for recycle and one for trash. Both get taken out almost every day by my wonderful husband. So how we came to have MAGGOTS is beyond me! Yes, I have seen a fly or two, but with three kids and a dog constantly in and out and in and out and, well, you get the idea. Here is how this morning went. I was asleep, SOUND asleep, as I usually am at 430 AM. Then I hear, Mommas, I need your help down here. As I jump up I see my husband at the top of the stairs in his boxers and latex gloves. Initially I think, what the hell!!! What weird thing has he woken me up out of a peaceful slumber to do...with latex gloves on, no less. Yeah, my mind can go to weird places. That thought was brief though, because only a second later he informed me of the situation.
I shivered, my skin crawled, I started to itch and scratch and I think I vomited a little in my mouth. Oh, in case I didn't mention it, I hate bugs and creepy crawlies. Worms are among the least favorite, and maggots are at the top of the gross out list. I even tolerate slugs more, and that is because they don't move as quick and I can see where they went if they try to hide. Back to the main story here. So I run down and the scene in the kitchen is somewhat hilarious and somewhat disturbing. There is a smell that slightly burns my throat and eyes and there is a white substance all over my floor. Hmmmm.....what happened here?
Well, apparently my husband tried many things, but maggots are tolerant little buggers. He tried salt right off the bat, since we know this works for both ants and slugs. We had a big slug problem at our last town home. Lines of salt at all the door jams and window sills. We looked like we were trying to do some weird voodoo, or maybe attract deer. Well, it doesn't effect maggots. If anything, it enhanced the flovor of the crap they were eating. Way to go there top chef husband. So then he decided to find the bug spray we have. This stuff smells horrible, and that is probably why it is outdoor spray. But it was used there. Guess what, nothing. Now they are just annoyed that their meal is covered in bug spray, which for all I know is better than salt, who knows.
I must mention that the garbage can has already been removed from the house and sealed, but they were crawling out of it, yeah it was discovered initially because as my husband was making breakfast, he heard a rustling noise. Thank goodness he discovered it, because I would have FREAKED OUT!!!!
Back to getting rid of them. I ran back upstairs, and immediately looked up how to kill them Well, I can poor boiling water on them, sweep them up and freeze them, squish them, and some other things too. I can't really poor boiling water straight onto my carpet or hardwood, so we sweep everything up, seal the bag, and I begin to look for escapees. As I yell, my husband squishes them. Then he abandons me. Well, he has to go to work. I have been on maggot patrol now all morning. And I have been cleaning like a maniac. That kicked me out of the funk for sure. I said I needed motivation, well, there is was, wriggling around my kitchen.
Yeah, so that was the start of my day, so can it get better? Hopefully, my husband has already promised beer and pizza for dinner, so I will at least get a break after cleaning all day.
Tuesday, August 3, 2010
Facebook musings
So here I am, worn out from the day and checking my facebook account as I do frequently throughout the day. I waste alot of time on this, I admit it. Betty White was right, it is a huge waste of time. But I am addicted, and need a 12 step program. The reason I bring up facebook though, is to talk about the person who feels the need to update their status every 10 minutes. Seriously? Do I care that much about everything you do? Do you even care that much about everything you do? I know, this has been a topic on other sites and other places, and even SNL, but I HAD to say something. You know you have those friends, or it may even be you...the status updates that go something like this-
"Going to go to the store today need groceries"
"Getting dressed and then going to the store today"
" Have to get my coffee, then to the store"
" In line for my $6 coffee, hope I have enough left to buy groceries"
"Got coffee, getting in car"
"Spilled $6 coffee updating my status, need to go home and change then I can go get groceries. Crap"
Yeah, so you get the idea, right? The day goes on and on, and there are some random crappy mobile picture uploads of their kids in the grocery cart, or the spilled coffee. Hell, if I wanted a play by play, I would have called you. Maybe if you weren't so busy texting on your phone you would have been able to get into the car without spilling your coffee in the first place idiot! Plus, Starbucks tastes like crap. Yes, I said it. I don't care for them AT ALL! I will drink them if it is all I can get, or if someone else is buying, but I am not gonna spend my money on it. This is a whole other topic though!
Also, why the cryptic messages? Is it so people will ask and you get to be the center of attention? Just say what it is, you usually say it about three responses down anyway! Do you tease just so you see who is paying any attention?
The other thing I want to mention is how many people I have blocked due to their stupid farmville, fishville, whatever ville updates. I have 2 friends who actually put it in their status update about their farm and what animals they need or stuff that goes wrong. I was very confused at first, since I don't play any of these games. My one friend was talking about being able to milk a green cow of hers. The first thing I wondered was where the hell she kept a cow at her house, and then what the hell was wrong with it that it was green! Maybe she should have the vet check that out. Then I discovered she was a farmville ADDICT. I mean, like 4 and 5 hours a day playing this game. So my point on this is please don't bug me about need me to build a barn or open a gift, I have things to do..like update my facebook status. "Just finished posting to my blog"
"Going to go to the store today need groceries"
"Getting dressed and then going to the store today"
" Have to get my coffee, then to the store"
" In line for my $6 coffee, hope I have enough left to buy groceries"
"Got coffee, getting in car"
"Spilled $6 coffee updating my status, need to go home and change then I can go get groceries. Crap"
Yeah, so you get the idea, right? The day goes on and on, and there are some random crappy mobile picture uploads of their kids in the grocery cart, or the spilled coffee. Hell, if I wanted a play by play, I would have called you. Maybe if you weren't so busy texting on your phone you would have been able to get into the car without spilling your coffee in the first place idiot! Plus, Starbucks tastes like crap. Yes, I said it. I don't care for them AT ALL! I will drink them if it is all I can get, or if someone else is buying, but I am not gonna spend my money on it. This is a whole other topic though!
Also, why the cryptic messages? Is it so people will ask and you get to be the center of attention? Just say what it is, you usually say it about three responses down anyway! Do you tease just so you see who is paying any attention?
The other thing I want to mention is how many people I have blocked due to their stupid farmville, fishville, whatever ville updates. I have 2 friends who actually put it in their status update about their farm and what animals they need or stuff that goes wrong. I was very confused at first, since I don't play any of these games. My one friend was talking about being able to milk a green cow of hers. The first thing I wondered was where the hell she kept a cow at her house, and then what the hell was wrong with it that it was green! Maybe she should have the vet check that out. Then I discovered she was a farmville ADDICT. I mean, like 4 and 5 hours a day playing this game. So my point on this is please don't bug me about need me to build a barn or open a gift, I have things to do..like update my facebook status. "Just finished posting to my blog"
So this will be my "anonymous" outlet
So let me start this out by stating that I am not in this to become the next it blogger(is there such a thing?) or to inspire anyone. It is strictly for me. Yep, me. I am starting this as a way to vent, rant, rave, write, document, share and be silly all at the same time, and maybe along the way there will be a reader or two...three if I am REALLY lucky. So first you may ask WHY? Well, to be perfectly honest, I have no freakin idea! It isn't like I don't have enough on my plate already. I work during the school year, and have three kids who are very active and have their stuff to shuttle to, and I am in mommy groups, and I do all sorts of crafty things, plus I organize a book club, plus I have the dog and occasionally I like to have sex with my husband(that is when I am not completely exhausted from everything else!) I just need someplace to journal all of these random thoughts I have and to tell my stories. I tried using a real journal on more than one occasion. It doesn't work. I tried, I SWEAR! I bought a pretty pink leather one once. I have about 4 full journaled pages in it. Do you know what is in the rest of it? Grocery lists, and to do lists, and maybe a budget or two. Plus, it gave me writers cramp. No...seriously. I hate handwriting. I know, it is a lost art, blah blah blah. I just prefer to type it on my computer. I am faster that way, and if I make a spelling error, there is that neat little feature that I can use to fix all my spelling errors. Of course, I also like to make up words, so that feature isn't always the most helpful but oh well.
So now onto the what. WHAT will this blog be about. The hell if I know. It will most likely be my babblings on the things that happen around my house, the stupid/ridiculous things I see or hear when I am out and about or perusing the internet and random things that enter my head (it hurts up there, seriously I need to get some of these things onto paper, or blogger, or whatever ) I may post daily, or weekly or multiple times a day, or even more than once and hour. It just depends on how much coffee I have had, how much I have to say and how many Phineas and Ferb episodes are on in a row to keep my kids occupied and out of my craft/computer room!
So that is that. I have started my blog. Enjoy, and if there is anyone out there, leave a message. Just try not to be too mean.
So now onto the what. WHAT will this blog be about. The hell if I know. It will most likely be my babblings on the things that happen around my house, the stupid/ridiculous things I see or hear when I am out and about or perusing the internet and random things that enter my head (it hurts up there, seriously I need to get some of these things onto paper, or blogger, or whatever ) I may post daily, or weekly or multiple times a day, or even more than once and hour. It just depends on how much coffee I have had, how much I have to say and how many Phineas and Ferb episodes are on in a row to keep my kids occupied and out of my craft/computer room!
So that is that. I have started my blog. Enjoy, and if there is anyone out there, leave a message. Just try not to be too mean.
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